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The Path Begins Here
Divorce wasn’t the end of your story — it was the crack that revealed the story beneath it.
You’re not just hurt. You’re haunted.
By patterns you didn’t know you were following.
By wounds you didn’t know were bleeding.
By questions you still don’t know how to ask — let alone answer.
This is the point most men get stuck.
They try to rebuild too fast.
Tell themselves they’ve moved on, when they’ve just gone numb.
But if you’re ready to do it differently — to go through the fire, not around it — there are two ways to begin.
What if your divorce was a symptom, and not the disease?
Your divorce didn’t break you.
It revealed the cracks that were already there —
The loneliness you ignored.
The rage you swallowed.
The part of you that handed over your power … and called it love.
Most men never face that.
They decorating the ruins.
Same patterns. Different house.
Then wonder why it still feels hollow.
Divorce isn’t a knockout. It’s a wake-up call.
Not just to survive — but to rise.
To become the kind of man your children remember when life gets hard.
The kind of man who doesn’t run from pain — but leads himself through it.
Which Phase Are You In?
Wherever you are on the path — reeling in the fog or ready to lead from fire — there’s a way forward.
Collapse to Clarity
An 8-Week Online Course
You’re not crazy. You’re just waking up.
Divorce cracked your world open — but it didn’t give you a map.
You’ve been trying to keep it together while something deeper unravels.
Collapse to Clarity is how you stop reacting and start seeing.
It’s the descent into truth — not to punish yourself, but to find yourself.
You can’t rebuild until you understand what broke.
That’s what this course is for.
If you’re asking: “How did I get here?”
Caught in Reaction
Seeking understanding
Learning to pause
Reclaiming power
Starting the descent
Your descent begins here
Ashes to Authority
6-Month 1:1 Coaching
Most men stop at insight.
They start to see the patterns, take some ownership, maybe even feel better for a while.
But the real work — the rare work — begins where most men tap out:
Opening the heart. Letting the pain shape you.
And then building something sacred with what’s left.
That’s what Ashes to Authority is for.
“What am I building now?”
Creating from truth
Embodying wisdom
Leading with clarity
Reclaiming self
Returning from the descent
This Isn’t a Straight Line. It’s a Descent.
Right now, you may feel like you’re wandering a foggy dreamscape.
Half-awake. Half-lost. Fully unsure of what’s real.
You’re holding it together — work, kids, maybe the gym.
But under all that?
You’re still trying to make sense of what just happened.
You’re still playing out arguments in your head months after they ended.
You sit in the driveway after drop-off, wondering how you got here.
Sometimes it’s numbness. Sometimes it’s rage
Sometimes, against all odds, it’s her text at 11:47pm and you almost reply.
Welcome to the absurd theatre of post-divorce life.
New script. Same old wounds.
No intermission.
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The fog isn’t failure. It’s an invitation.
To stop performing.
To stop pretending.
To finally strip away what no longer serves and remember the man beneath the debris.
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You don’t need to perform here. Just begin
Testimonials
Wow, what a call I just had with Jeff
Jeff helped me identify that my next move on the money chessboard is neither High nor Low. It’s a Move that will get me closer to Victory.
Huge mindshift for me in becoming more at peace with myself. He has helped to open my eyes in recognising that I should not get too high with the highs in life and to recognize the lows as pure uppertunities to get back up and build momentum to my goals.
I’ve made a lot of extreme moves in life but now I will be more consistent persistent.
Jeff helped me start feeling like my old self again. I realized that there’s nothing wrong with me, and that I can become the best version of myself, as long as I keep putting in the effort necessary to make that happen. Who we truly are always remains within us, we just lose sight of our Selves sometimes. Looking deep within myself revealed the path back to health.
I’m grateful to Jeff for his time and commitment to me, and I highly recommend that you speak with him. You won’t be disappointed.
My reactions to life’s events have also evolved significantly. Things have happened around me recently, instead of an emotional response to the issues. I process it, understand it, able to jump straight to solving issues with a clear mind. Although, emotion still come in waves. I’ve learned to channel them constructively, approaching them with logic and acceptance. It is not a suppression of an emotion, but an understanding and accepting them, acknowledging that life has its ups and downs, and that’s perfectly okay.
I’m now able to see things from a zoomed-out view. I can analyze situations from a broader perspective rather than only from my viewpoint. It helps me to sense different things in advance in the future and deepen understanding of human psychology in general.
Another insight is that understanding that there is a negative and positive for everything. Life itself is neutral. It’s our perceptions that often color it otherwise.
Hi, I’m Jeff Kolez
Leader, Explorer, Wayfinder
Like many men, I thought divorce would be the end of a chapter.
Instead, it was the beginning of an initiation.
I lost everything: my marriage, my home, my stability, and for a time — my sense of self.
I spent years caught in the storm: in courtrooms, in conflict, in shame.
But eventually I realized the real war wasn’t between me and my ex.
It was between who I had been — and who I was being called to become.
Divorce wasn’t a detour. It was the descent.
I didn’t want to become the kind of man who talks about his wounds louder than his values.
I wanted to become a man my children could look up to.
That’s the work I now guide others through: Not to numb the pain, but to meet it with presence.
Not to escape the fire, but to walk through it
This isn’t coaching. It’s reclamation.
If you’re ready to lead yourself through the madness, I’ll help you find the way.
Read my story.
